Ok I'm obsessed!

Ok I have to confess I am just beyond obsessed with my sweet baby! He is just so much fun and is changing so much every day! Here are a cute new pics from today!

He even smiles in his sleep!

1 month reminders..

I can't believe that my sweet baby is already 5 and a half weeks old! The past 6 weeks have gone by so fast and I am loving every min of having this sweet boy in our life. He just makes us so happy and and has the best little personality. I want to be able to remember everything about him when he gets older. I saw this idea on a few other blogs and love it. I am just going to list some things that Holden is up to each month so it is easier to look back and see how much they he will change.

This was before his 1 month doctors appt.
I love this outfit

His first time taking a nap in his bed! Today I was trying to clean out his closet and put clothes up so I layed him in there for his nap and he loved it! The blanket was the one that he got while he was in the NICU.

This was from my parents house yesterday after his first trip to church! He did so good and slept almost the whole time

We did leave Holden for the first time Saturday night with Nana Anna and Papa Billy for about an hour so that Jack and I could go to dinner. I think he slept the whole time. This was before we left I think Chatt and Bebe thought that they were in charge of watching him! ha! So here are a few things I want to remember:

• He is still in newborn clothes and diapers. But I have started putting 0-3 month clothes on him in the past week just because he is so long and I wanted to see some different clothes.
• He eats about 2-3 oz every 2-3 hours during the day and about 3-4oz every 3 or more hours at night
• Most night he goes at least 4 hours between feedings
• He is a great eater and doesn't mind either breastfeeding or bottle feeding
• He is starting to smile when you talk to him- this is sooo cute and I lOVE it
• He loves his paci but spits it out to sleep
• He loves being in the car and falls asleep as soon as we put him in his car seat
• He is still on his meds once a day but hopefully soon will be coming off of them
• Right now his eyes are still blue! Jack and I both have had brown eyes our whole life but both Jack's dad and grandfather have blue eyes
• His new favorite thing is to sleep on his stomach. He loves this so much and is out as soon as you lay him down
• Yesterday was his first trip to church and he did great!
• He is loved soo much by so many people
• His hands are always up by his face or together

Holden we love you so much and are so happy to have you!

A little of this and that

We had a pretty busy week at our house this week! Monday Holden had his one month check up at his pediatrician. He is now 9 lbs and in the 29 percential for weight and is 22 inches long and in the 66 percential for height. So he is just long and skinny. Can't imagine where he gets that from since both Jack and I were long and skinny as kids. He did great and got his second Hep.B shot which he did not like at all but it was over fast. After his doctors appt. we went by and saw Andie and Campbell (the little boy I keep) and hung out for a little bit. Cam was so happy and loved trying to poke Holden and just try to play with him. It was so cute and you can tell that they are going to be great friends when they get older! Tueday we didn't do much except for venture out to get my oil changed in my car. Then Wednesday we had Holden's appt at his neurologist office for an EEG. We were there for about two hours and he did great and I was able to hold him the whole time while he slept thru the whole thing. I thought that I might have heard back from his doctor either Thursday or Friday but still haven't yet so I guess he will call sometime this week. Thursday and Friday were pretty boring and we just stayed around the house. Then this morning I woke up about 5:30 ish to feed Holden and I could hear our cat Simon throwing up down the hall. Something that is very normal in our house since he feels the need to eat everytime we go close to his food. But something was different this time I could hear him go down stairs and it sounded like he just kept throwing up. Then the next thing I knew I could hear him meowing a lot which he doesn't do much unless he wants to try and escape out the door to go outside when we do. Since I was feeding Holden I woke up Jack and told him something was wrong and to go check it out. He came running back upstairs saying he need to go to the hospital now (Simon not Jack) I got up and went down stairs wher I found our poor Simon just laying on the floor. He had lost all control of his back legs. So I called Mom about 6 to find out what time my Uncle Stephen and Aunt Lisa got to their vet clinic every morning and that Simon was dying. She told us to go ahead and leave and they would be there by the time we got there. So Jack ran and got his clothes on and ran out the door with him without even saying by. It turns out he had a blood clot that formed and cut off the blood supply to his legs and he was in a lot of pain. There was nothing that they could do so Jack had to make the hard decision to put him to sleep. Our sweet, get into everything, 17 year old cat. He was a sweet cat and had a great life and was VERY spoiled but he was very old. So tonight I think we might have a date night just the two of us and go to our favorite little italian restaurant down the street from my parents. I am not looking forward to leaving my sweet boy behind but Nana Anna and Papa Billy will do a great job keeping him. And I really want to leave him once before Feb. 1st when I have jury duty and have to leave him for who knows how long!

Happy 1 Month Birthday Holden!

Where has the past month gone?? Time has gone by so fast and I can't believe that Holden has already been here for a month! Here are a few pictures of where we were a month ago today...

This was actually the Sunday before Holden was born. I was 38 weeks.
Right after he was born

Jack and I in the OR

And today!

I have several onsies and outfits with guitars on them and I love this one! Not only does it have the two guitars on it that I'm sure his Uncle Michael and Kyle just love but it has the wings on it like angel wings cause we know he is watchin over us!

Happy 1 month birthday my sweet boy! We love you!

Holden Rocks!

Here are some cute new pics of our sweet boy today!

I LOVE this one!

We haven't been up to much these past few days. We went shopping one day to return somethings and to buy a cute new onsie for him to wear tomorrow. But besides that we have pretty much been at home. Last night we went to my Dad's for dinner and tonight I think we might have dinner with our neighbors and Holden's girlfriend Paytin. I'll see if I can get a picture of them together ha! Yesterday they called to schedule his EEG for next Wednesday so lets hope that all goes well with that so he can come off of this medicine! Have an awesome weekend!

I love it Nana

Today I was changing Holden in his room on his changing table, something that hardly ever happens usually we just do on our bed, and he just started staring at the mosiac that my Mom made him. We haven't figured out a way to hang it yet so it is just sitting on the back of his changing table and he loves it. He was trying really hard to talk to it too! And yes he has on Santa jammies.... he is still in newborn cloths and I don't want to buy anymore of them so Santa jammies it is! : )

I love my boys!

I just can't get enought of this sweet boy! He is so sweet and the best baby!
The blanket he is laying on in some of these pictures was one of mine when I was little that I used to keep and my Grandma and Grandpa's house and they gave back to me at one of my showers.

I LOVE this one!

And my boys! Jack is the BEST Daddy ever and he loves Holden so much.

I love them so much!

No playing in the snow for this sweet Boy

What's that you say? It's snowing?? I want to go out and play in it!

Holden it is too cold we are not going to play in the snow.
Please Mommy I promise I'll be a good boy...

Maybe if I just act cute Mommy and Daddy will let me go play in the snow...

Or maybe I'll just take a nap!

We got about an inch of snow here at our house and lots of ice so we have been cooped up in our house since Thursday. But we did go to my follow up with my doctor and his neurologist appt before the snow rolled in. My appt went great and my blood pressure was wonderful so I am down to one dose a day for one more week! YEA! Then Thursday afternoon we went to his neurologist appt where everything went great also. They said he looks great and they are going to do a repeat EEG in the next two weeks and if everything comes back normal he will be off meds also! So we are very happy about that!

Look who's here!!

Our sweet Baby boy is finally here! Holden Michael was born December 16th at 5:29. He weighed 7 lbs 7 oz (my doctors were off a bit thinking he was so big) and was 20.5 inches long. He is the sweetest thing ever and is the best baby!

Here he was New Year's Day and here is our crazy story of all that happened to both of us!

Tuesday, Dec. 15th: My Mom and I headed to my weekly doctors appt expecting to go in for them to say everything is fine with Holden and I and we would be on our way back home soon. Well things didn't go that way. I saw the doctor and she said everything was fine and ten the nurse came in to take my blood pressure and it was thru the roof. So they had me lay on my side and relax for awhile and came back in about 20 min later to find it still high. The doctor said I had PIH(pregnancy induced hypertension) and I was was being admitted to the hospital for induction. Jack was at work so he finished what he was doing and headed down to the hospital and Mom headed home for the night. The plan was to wait until the next morning for pitocin and for me to get cervidil that night. So I got the cervidil and a sleeping pill and Jack and I settled into our Labor and Delivery room for the night.

Wednesday, Dec. 16th: We woke up and at 9am the cervidil was removed, pitocin was started and my water was broken. We were so excited that today was going to be the day that we were going to meet this sweet baby boy that we had been waiting for for so long. About an hour later my contractions were very strong and every 2-3 mi apart.... can we say epidural time! Ha! I was a little worried about it since I hate needles but it was the best thing ever. The rest of my labor went great. I had a room full of about 15 family and friends all waiting. About 3 I was 10cm and Holden wasn't coming down but we decided to go ahead and start pushing. An hour and a half later still no baby and I am done. I am so tired of pushing and my doctor gave me the option to wait longer and see if he is going to come down or C-Section. I told him C-Section with out thinking twice. I just knew that I couldn't do it anymore and we all just thought he was too big to fit. At 5:10 we went in to surgery and at 5:29 Holden was born. This is where things started to go bad. When the doctor made the incision, my uterus tore a lot and they couldn't find the end of where it ended. And I started to feel a lot more than I should and I started crying for more medicine. The doctor started yelling to get other doctors in the room and finally the anesthesiologist made he best decision ever for me and put me to sleep. It turns out that I lost a lot of blood and had to have 3 pints of it given to me on the table. I had not seen Holden at all except for the top of a piece of his head and luckily Jack and our wonderful neighbor Colleen, who works at the office that delivered Holden, were able to be in the delivery room. So at this point Jack was taken out of the delivery room fast and didn't know exactly what was going on so he sees everyone in the waiting room and he is a mess so they think something really bad has happened. This is where it was so wonderful to have someone on the inside able to fill in everyone about what is going on. I made it out of surgery and was taken to recovery and Jack and Holden were taken to a family room so everyone could see and hold him. The next thing I remember is waking up in recovery about 9:00 that night. I was then taken to ICU and Holden was taken to the nursery. I still have not seen him yet.

Thursday, Dec. 17th: I am doing ok, still in the ICU, still have not seen my baby. Some how I talk on of the nurses into calling the nursery and talking them into bringing him to see me. And around 11 he finally made it to my room... with a nurse and security escort since he was under lo-jack.

My sweet boy is doing great and is the so beautiful. I am so excited to finally get to hold him and see him. As you can see I have gained weight after having a baby. I had been so thirsty from not being able to drink anything since Tuesday night and was happy also to get some water and to be able to brush my teeth. At this point in the day I have about 6 bags of fluids running thru two pumps and right now one IV. I got another one later when I got two more bags of blood.

Friday, Dec. 18th: I was so excited cause they were moving me out of ICU to HRP (High-risk perinatal) and this meant that Holden would be able to spend the rest of our hospital stay in the room with me! I ended up going here instead of a regular postpartum room cause my blood pressure is still very high. I get into my room and have my nurse go call for Holden to come to my room. As soon as she leaves the phone in my room rings. It a doctor from the NICU calling to say that Holden had been moved to the NICU from the regular nursery. He had had a seizure and they wanted him to stay with them for awhile. I jumped back in a wheelchair and went straight up to see him. This picture is from I think Saturday night. He was also jaundice so he was under the light and had just had a MRI so he was out of it so they gave him a feeding tube for the night. He is also having a second EEG at the same time so he is hooked up to a lot in this picture. After all the test the doctors ran they think a blood clot formed when they cut his umbilical cord and traveled to his brain and made him have the seizures and a stroke. They said they MRI also showed some signs of scar tissue that formed from this but only time will tell how and if it will effect him at all.

These got a little out of order.... this is my first time seeing him again with my Mom.

Here Holden and I are with our wonderful Colleen who we could have NEVER gone thru all this with out her. She was beyond amazing and helped us out so much. And we love her soooo much!

Saturday, Dec 19- Tuesday, Dec. 22: All these day kinda run together from here on. I stay in HRP and Holden is still in NICU. We have been told be his doctor that he has had a few more seizures and a stroke but has been given some meds for it and has been fine ever since. On these days I would wake up and wait for the doctor to come in and see how I was and then head up to the NICU to spend time with Holden. I hated every minute that I had to leave him up there but I knew that he was much better off than any other baby in there and was going to be just fine. Then came Monday. I was supposed to be discharged on Monday and I had been dreading it cause I knew that I would be leaving him behind. But my doctor came in and since my blood pressure was still high they decided to keep me another day. I was so ready to go home but didn't want to leave the hospital without Holden. So I was very happy to stay another day! On Tuesday they kicked me out and I was discharged and sent home without my baby. That is the worst feeling in the world having to leave him behind. We had begged for him to be able to come home since he wasn't even hooked up to anything they were just watching him and then they said he could tomorrow. So I went home and ate and took a shower and went straight to bed. I couldn't wait to wake up in the morning and go bring my baby home!

This is from when he first was sent to the NICU on Friday.

Wednesday, Dec. 23rd: Holden came home! We were so happy to bring him home and have him home for Christmas. He was sent home on the anti-seizure medicine phenobarbital and I also came home on medicine for my high blood pressure and potassium which was low the whole time I was at the hospital.

And here is our sweet boy now. He is doing great and gaining weight and sleeping almost thru the night. And he is also showing no signs of any kind of seizure or stroke. He is such a wonderful baby and he just makes us so happy.

This is on our way home from the hospital.

Just home

Holden was the best Christmas present that I could ever ask for!